Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
