the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I am spending my child support on dildos
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Randomize
