what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
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