I wanna passion pit in your ass
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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