The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Randomize
