I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I AM VODKA MAN
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
40s are totally the cure
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
