how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
