question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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