evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I party with great urgency now.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
