You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
