i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize