Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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