What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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