let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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