your parents love me but you hate me
So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
