what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
