Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize