Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
