how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Randomize
