i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
