why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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