And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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