There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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