Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
