I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
