It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
