I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
