all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
