Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
People in love make me want to vomit
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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