At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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