we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I fill condoms, not promises.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
