apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
