so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize
