She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Blow job season was short but glorious.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
