just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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