i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize