He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
