i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Randomize
