The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
