Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I wish there were birth control emojis
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
