i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
oh god was she eating orange peels again
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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