Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Randomize
