She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
