I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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