i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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