last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
