So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
