I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Randomize