dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Randomize
