Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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