Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize