Got a toothbrush?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
